Uncharted – A book chapter update

Well, this is it! The last update in the years long updates regarding my book chapter (here, here, here, and here), you know just to name a few of the previous times I’ve talked about it. Okay, I cannot promise this will be the last time I talk about it, but it is one of the reasons I was reminded that I should update the blog more often, at least every once and awhile. I mean, I’ve got like 5 posts this year in, so it’s safe to say I’m behind. So let’s talk about the chapter.

To be honest, I’m a bit nervous about the whole thing. It’s a lot, putting myself out there like this and it’s out of my control. I can’t turn it off one day if I don’t like it anymore like I could (theoretically anyway) with my blog. It’s no longer my story, it’s outside for others. I’m still a bit nervous to share despite having told the story so many times before here as I worked through all the thoughts and feelings I still deal with. But I guess before I get cryptic about this I should explain for those who don’t feel like reading all the links (I don’t blame you, I probably wouldn’t either).

A few years…? ago, I don’t even remember how long ago. I think it was just shortly after starting my PhD so awhile ago, I came across a retweet from someone who was writing a book full of stories about surviving academia. Now my story with academia is all over the place, but I wrote a paragraph, sent it in, and assumed it wasn’t what they were looking for because my story is more about the transition from the military to academia. How I got extremely lucky over the years and I found people, or really one person specifically, who helped.

That person was the head of the undergrad program for the mechanical engineering department and as a rule he’s automatically included in the acknowledgements of anything (my master’s thesis and my PhD dissertation for example). He’s the reason I was able to continue the program despite not officially making the cut. It’s a long story, but one I summed up pretty succinctly in my chapter (thanks in so small part to the editors of the book).

Well, obviously I got selected and there have been multiple edits, and lots of updates with the logistics, but nothing really worth sharing. Well the book is here finally! At least it’s ready for pre-order as of this writing and the reviews seem good from the people who’ve read it. Now I haven’t read the other chapters, but they all look very interesting so I’m nervous, but excited to see others stories. I still feel like mine is a bit out of place in the book, but maybe I’m not the only one. I’m trying not to think about it too much as I go from being very excited to scared, back to excited, then just plain confused.

It’s a lot of emotions for one little chapter, but maybe that’s a theme around here. I can be dramatic, or so I’m told. I guess I just tend to feel things in a big way so I show them in an equally big way? It’s tough to say since so many people think I’m generally very level (exactly the opposite of how I feel inside!) anyway enough about me and my weird feelings. The book is here, I did a thing and it’s scary, but I did it and if you’re interested in hearing other stories about how people survive life in academia either because of, or in spite of, academia, then this book is for you!

I don’t get paid to promote it, I’m only mentioning it because I feel like the stories were worth being told and even though I don’t feel like mine was worth telling, I got included so I’m trying to keep that feeling to myself as much as I can. All-in-all I’m happy I got to be a part of it and I’m excited to get a copy of it. I will never recommend it to the people whom I interact with on a daily basis (classmates, workmates, etc.) but for everyone here it feels like something I can easily recommend without the fear of being looked at differently. If you know you know, it’s the sad puppy eyes you get when people learn something horrible about you. The poor you look. But that probably says more about my own issues than others, I mean it may just be in my head frankly, but that doesn’t make it any less real.

To sum up the post (TL;DR) the book is almost here and I have far too many emotions about the whole thing. Maybe I’ll get my emotions sorted out before it comes, maybe not, but regardless of how I feel about it, it’s coming soon!

So yeah, big update. Lots of stuff happening around here despite not writing it all down.