Day 338: Feeling stuck, again

I’ve probably mentioned this before, but I feel stuck. With the pandemic going on and the protests (Which are still happening!) I don’t feel like there has been any forward movement in anything I’ve been involved with. I hate feeling like this, it’s so frustrating especially when I feel like I’m drowning in work to be done.

Grad school is work. It’s a (sometimes) uphill battle that wears a person down on occasion. Okay, probably a lot more than just occasionally. I would still recommend it, don’t get me wrong, but right now we’re living in some fairly unusual circumstances and it’s been making me feel like I’m swimming through molasses or something. Every small step forward feels like it takes 10x the amount of effort and energy. Yet when I stop and look at what I’ve accomplished, it’s always the bare minimum to get by.

I can’t seem to get ahead on my work. It feels like no matter what I do it’s not enough to finish one thing and the worst part of all of this, I keep getting new things to do! Don’t get me wrong, I know it will get done eventually and this will pass, it always passes. It’s just shitty to be stuck in the middle of it.

There is an easy fix of course, I just simply need a project to finish. To get the satisfaction of completing something substantial and see some sort of result for all the effort I’m putting into these things. I don’t need to complete everything, just one thing would be nice. It would remind me that there is an end and (hopefully) give me the motivation to finish the rest of the work I need to do.

In any case, it’s back to work I go. I am close to finishing up some things, I really am. It just seems that the closer I get the more setbacks I have.